Or do. I don't know what to tell you about it, but I recently went for a run.
Nothing special. It was another half hour or so of just get out and go. The standard. I was hoping to get aboout (what am I, Canadian over here with these typos?) 30 minutes of feet to street. Probably 2-3 miles. Standard.
Standard.
Only, it wasn't standard. I was angry. Not like, "sorta peeved", but really just full on "Hulk Smash" angry.
Which is sort of anti-me, but whatever. I occasionally get mad about something.
It happens.
And this day was the day.
Well THAT day I was pissed really. Seething inside. I felt I had been slighted in a thing at work was sort of the cause of it. I'm blaming work, but really it was a whole bunch of things. Stresses from my job. Stresses from The Wife's job.
The Kids.
Outside family matters.
All of that was on my brain and it just kept roiling and rolling; boiling and bubbling. I resigned myself to getting not too many miles in. Probably only 15 minutes. 20, tops. I set my RunKeeper app and started off. You get that way and you know the feeling, too, I'm sure.
So that's where I was and it kinda pissed me off to be mad when it was such a great fall day. I turned the corner of my block. Crisp air. No clouds. Down another street, up the hill to the top of the ridge. Slight breeze with a hint of an oak-hickory fire off in the distance. check behind you when you cross that street for the blind corner. The good stuff. And I was out in it.
But I wasn't enjoying it. Watch out for that deer. Oh! Shit! Look out for the other one!
So now I was pissed at myself for being pissed. Which is totally stupid. I'm not allowed to be mad? Of course I'm allowed to be mad, Me. Shut your pie hole and head down to the lake!
No, you shut yours! I'll run where I want!
NO, DICK! YOU SHUT YOURS AND GO TO THE FUCKIN' LAKE!!!
The battle raged, but it didn't stop. It didn't slow or falter or flag in any way. Just me and myself fighting it out in my skull. One side mad and the other side mad for being mad. It was all pretty confusing and pointless really. I realized it was senseless to argue with myself over being angry and the root causes of the anger; turn left. I get it. Makes sense; turn right.
Maybe the job thing was sort of, just a miscommunication; back up the hill. Perhaps The Kids are just kids and worried about nothing, like usual. Around that corner, mind the mini-van. Perhaps it is that your extended family is not fully versed in your schedule and you need to tell them about it; jump the creek.
Yes. Surely the job thing isn't as you think it is; left. Just write that email and say these 5 things...; right turn. Get some flowers for The Wife, she will love them; stretch that stride. Slow down with the kids and let them help you make dinner. Find a recipe they can work with you on; reach with your toes and pull the earth to you. Mind the gate.
When it was all over I had gone for nearly an hour and averaged just shy of a 9'30" pace!
WHAT!?!? Craziness!
But it was true. I found that my distraction of all the crap in my head and the constant rolling it over passed the time better than my mp3s, better than the usual mindless chit chat in my head. Better than concentrating on form and all the breathing and stride and blah blah blah.
And I felt better when I was done. I had my run in. I had some issues solved or planned out to next steps. Weight was lifted off of my shoulders. It felt great.
I stood there in my backyard on that crisp autumn day, sun warming my sweaty face, and I just enjoyed the finish. It was a surprise.
It was relieving. It was relaxing. It was a good run.
Nothing special. It was another half hour or so of just get out and go. The standard. I was hoping to get aboout (what am I, Canadian over here with these typos?) 30 minutes of feet to street. Probably 2-3 miles. Standard.
Standard.
Standard.
Standard.
Which is sort of anti-me, but whatever. I occasionally get mad about something.
It happens.
And this day was the day.
Well THAT day I was pissed really. Seething inside. I felt I had been slighted in a thing at work was sort of the cause of it. I'm blaming work, but really it was a whole bunch of things. Stresses from my job. Stresses from The Wife's job.
The Kids.
Outside family matters.
All of that was on my brain and it just kept roiling and rolling; boiling and bubbling. I resigned myself to getting not too many miles in. Probably only 15 minutes. 20, tops. I set my RunKeeper app and started off. You get that way and you know the feeling, too, I'm sure.
So that's where I was and it kinda pissed me off to be mad when it was such a great fall day. I turned the corner of my block. Crisp air. No clouds. Down another street, up the hill to the top of the ridge. Slight breeze with a hint of an oak-hickory fire off in the distance. check behind you when you cross that street for the blind corner. The good stuff. And I was out in it.
But I wasn't enjoying it. Watch out for that deer. Oh! Shit! Look out for the other one!
So now I was pissed at myself for being pissed. Which is totally stupid. I'm not allowed to be mad? Of course I'm allowed to be mad, Me. Shut your pie hole and head down to the lake!
No, you shut yours! I'll run where I want!
NO, DICK! YOU SHUT YOURS AND GO TO THE FUCKIN' LAKE!!!
The battle raged, but it didn't stop. It didn't slow or falter or flag in any way. Just me and myself fighting it out in my skull. One side mad and the other side mad for being mad. It was all pretty confusing and pointless really. I realized it was senseless to argue with myself over being angry and the root causes of the anger; turn left. I get it. Makes sense; turn right.
Maybe the job thing was sort of, just a miscommunication; back up the hill. Perhaps The Kids are just kids and worried about nothing, like usual. Around that corner, mind the mini-van. Perhaps it is that your extended family is not fully versed in your schedule and you need to tell them about it; jump the creek.
Yes. Surely the job thing isn't as you think it is; left. Just write that email and say these 5 things...; right turn. Get some flowers for The Wife, she will love them; stretch that stride. Slow down with the kids and let them help you make dinner. Find a recipe they can work with you on; reach with your toes and pull the earth to you. Mind the gate.
When it was all over I had gone for nearly an hour and averaged just shy of a 9'30" pace!
WHAT!?!? Craziness!
But it was true. I found that my distraction of all the crap in my head and the constant rolling it over passed the time better than my mp3s, better than the usual mindless chit chat in my head. Better than concentrating on form and all the breathing and stride and blah blah blah.
And I felt better when I was done. I had my run in. I had some issues solved or planned out to next steps. Weight was lifted off of my shoulders. It felt great.
I stood there in my backyard on that crisp autumn day, sun warming my sweaty face, and I just enjoyed the finish. It was a surprise.
It was relieving. It was relaxing. It was a good run.
